Monday, February 2, 2009

Witty Old Woman (Funny)

This is a Joke that should bring you luck!

An elderly woman walked into the bank in Canada one morning with a purse pull of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the President of the bank because she had a lot of money.

After many lengthy discussions ( after all the customer is always right) an employee took the elderly woman to the presidents office.

The president of the bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit. She placed her purse on his desk and replied, "$165,000. The president was curious and ask her how she had been able to save such amount of money. The elderly woman replied that she made bets.

The president was surprised "what kind of bets?"

The elderly woman replied,"Well i bet you $25,000 that your testicles are square."

The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that.

The woman never batted an eye. She just looked at the president and said, "Would you like to take my bet?"

"Certainly", replied the president, "I bet you $25,000, that my testicles are not square."

"Done", the elderly woman answered. "But given the amount of money involved, if you don't mind i would like to come back at 10:00 clock tomorrow morning with my lawyer as a witness."

"No problem", said the president of the bank confidently.

That night, the president became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his testicles. Turning this way and that, checking them over again and again until he was positive that no one could consider his testicles as square and reassuring hinself that there was no way he could lose the bet.

The next morning at exactly 10' o clock the elderly woman arrived at the president's office with her lawyer and acknowledged the $25,000 bet made the day before that the president's testicles were square.

The president confirmed that the bet was the same as the one made the day before. Then the elderly woman asked him to drop his pants etc. so that she and her lawyer could see clearly.

The president was happy to oblige.

The elderly woman cam closer so she could see better and asked the president if she could touch them. "Of course" ,said the president. "Given the amount of money involved, you should be 100% be sure"

The elderly woman did so with a little smile. Suddenly the president noticed that the lawyer was banging his head against the wall. He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that and she replied, "Oh, its probably because i bet him $100,000 that around 10'o clock in the morning I would be holding the balls of the President of the Bank of Canada."


The origin of this Canadian story is unknown but it brings luck to everyone to whom it is sent.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Internet Sayings

Home is where you hang your @.

The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail.

A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click.

You can't teach a new mouse old clicks.

Great groups from little icons grow.

Speak softly and carry a cellular phone.

C: is the root of all directories.

Don't put all your hypes in one home page.

Pentium wise; pen and paper foolish.

The modem is the message.

Too many clicks spoil the browse.

The geek shall inherit the earth.

A chat has nine lives.

Don't byte off more than you can view.

Fax is stranger than fiction.

What boots up must come down.

Windows will never cease.

Virtual reality is its own reward.

Modulation in all things.

A user and his leisure time are soon parted.

There's no place like

Know what to expect before you connect.

Oh, what a tangled website we weave when first we practice.